The Bomb

I was dying for the working hours to come to an end today. I just so wanted to have the weekend approach.

Went dinner with friends and had a very good laugh. It’s been so long since I’ve laughed like that in a restaurant. It was then followed by a movie, “He’s Just Not That Into You”. Go watch it, okay? I’ve read the book, watched the movie today and I just feel like reading the book again.

Some scenes reminds me of the long-gone him and how I used to wait by the phone. I don’t know if it’s sad or pathetic or just a normal process some girls would have to go through but I don’t want to sweat about it anymore. Really.

I still truly believe I’ll meet the right one.

Came home and I don’t know how to deal with my mum. Sometimes when she stays for too long, I think she’s bored or I don’t know, she’ll start to pick on me and all. Like how yesterday, I had to change to another shirt as I was about to go to work because she didn’t approve of what I was wearing even though she used to say it’s a really nice top. Knowing that I wouldn’t want to argue with her, I’ve just changed to another piece. It’s all these small things that really drives me nut. I don’t know if I’m doing good enough to be a daughter because she never seems to be satisfied and it feels like I’ll never get there.

Pappy is funny and I think he can get lonely too with Mummy here and him alone there. And I think he understands my situation very well.

“Ask Mummy to come back and not to disturb you!”

When Pappy is here, I feel okay with going out with my friends because I know he would have friends that he could go out with and I wouldn’t need to worry so much about him. But it’s different with my mum. Sometimes when I go out with my friends, I’ll be thinking about her at home. Thinking when she would call if I ever come back late (and sometimes I get pissed because it’s very rare that I stay very late outside and it’s just the way she sounds on the phone that just makes me feel one kind but I know she cares…ohhh…how am I supposed to describe this?). And when friends date me out, I would have to consider if my mum is around because sometimes when I’m out with my friend, I feel the guilt. But I can’t be staying home forever and not go out with my friends. And right now, I’m just waiting for the bomb to drop…like how I’ll be getting a shout from the living room asking me why I’m still awake….even though it’s Friday night and I would say I deserve a slightly late night on weekends, don’t I?

Sorry but I just need to rant tonight. I really hate guys who text me and say they can’t sleep and expect me to do something about it. Like give them a call? Reply with some sleep-inducing messages? Or I just don’t know. I mean if you can’t sleep, you should give me a call instead of me calling you lor…or maybe I’m just pissed with him lah I don’t know. And please don’t ask me if I’m sleeping now when I’ve just replied to you that I’m not sleeping yet when you text me just 5 minutes ago. It really gets to my nerve man, especially when a guy acts like that.

Anyway, the bomb has been dropped…like how I expected.

very nice.

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